Different people, different goals, different approaches

We all know someone or at least know someone who knows someone, who has lost a lot of weight and kept it off.

Every diet program has success stories -people who have followed the program and gotten the promised results.

I personally know several people that I would consider to be athletes or at least very athletic who are very dedicated and at times very strict about their food and training - this is a requirement for them to be able to perform in their chosen sport or meet their athletic and aesthetic goals.

I've been thinking a lot lately about why these approaches work for some people, but don't seem to work for others (like me).

Here's what I came up with - we are all different (I know! What a surprise!) and so we should not expect that what works for others will always work for us, or that another person's goals are right for us.

I think part of the problem is that as a society there is a very narrow ideal about what a "good", "healthy" and "attractive" person looks like  and a very narrow view of what needs to be done achieve that. We use this outside appearance to judge everything about a person. Basically we are all trying to look like Michelle Bridges and we are told that to get there we have to dramatically restrict the amount and/or type of food we eat and exercise our guts out.

Now, if that is your goal, and you can achieve that in a sustainable and healthy way then I'm all for it - but I think sometimes it is worth assessing if societies expectations of us, and even our own expectations are actually realistic and achieveable for us and our circumstances at any one time.

Have a think about why you are so tied up in goals relating to your body - could you actually be happy and healthy as you are? If not, what is stopping you from achieving your goals? Do you find a meal plan hard to follow? Is it more important to you to spend your time with your kids, rather than at the gym? Do you want to be able to eat dessert when you go out - all of these things are OK!! If things are getting in the way all the time maybe it's time to re-calibrate your goals and expectations to align them with what is important to you - not to society.

Not all goals are achievable or even really important for everyone and there is also more than one way to skin a cat!  

For example, I CANNOT follow a prescribed meal plan, something goes funny in my brain when I feel like I'm not in control of my food choices. However I can put together and follow my own plan based on recipies and ideas from others etc. I've never been successful loosing weight following someone else's prescription, but I have lost weight just by making healthier choices. For other people the structure of a meal plan works really well.

I changed the method I used to achieve the goal.

Also, for a long time I was focused on trying to (one day) look like a fitness model and that led me down the diet/binge cycle. Now I am focused on being the healthiest and happiest version of me I can be and that drives much more stable and rational choices around food and exercise.

I re-calibrated the goal to reflect what is really important to me.

I want to make it clear that I'm not saying "aim low and avoid disappointment." I think personal growth is a wonderful thing and something we should always be working on. What I am saying is it is ok for us to all have different goals and it's also ok that we follow a different path to achieve those goals.

As an end note I want to say that it's also totally ok and highly recommended for you to have goals that are not related to your body at all - imagine what you could achieve if you channeled your energy elsewhere!